Shelton Hull has the final word on recently deceased hardcore wrestler Mike Awesome. And truly, he was.

List-Mania is running wild all over Bladejob. Shudder in terror as Matthew Damascus struggles to pick out the bright spots for wrestling in 2001.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mike Awesome is in the building. What can I say, I was sucked in by the hype and impressed by the execution. It’s one of those surreal moments that ONLY happens in professional wrestling. Felt like one of those comic books where fucking Loki or the Red Skull shows up to fight Spider Man, and it’s a total shock crossover, worlds colliding. For that one moment it worked. Awesome then proceeded to smash a crutch over Nash’s body and flicked off the audience while the announcers sputtered on about how he had an ECW title defense on Thursday. Awesome, rocking the lustrous Bon Jovi mullet WITH fanny pack, and somehow pulling off the look, picked up the mic and…

But Awesome put on a great match without relying on splintering wood for their shock-value cheers. That is a mark of a true champion in ECW, when they can impress the increasingly blood-thirsty Mongol hordes with a match NOT involving blood, tables, or violence against women.

Ditch this gimmick like the plague. It’s fucking bad, trailer park, crazy uncle, kind of shit. The snot rag doesn’t make sense. The gesture in itself is not particularly vile or sinister, it’s more bizarre like that kid who ate paste and boogers in second grade. AND RAVEN IS NO PASTE EATER!